Me and Dad

I now understand and appreciate that God's always been with me. My dad was in the military overseas when he met my Mom. Times were way different back then. My Grandma was a huge influence on my Dad. In my beginning, my Grandma was not a fan of my Dad marrying and bringing home a baby from another land. The good Lord had other plans and influenced him. And  it would turn out, my Grandma loved my Mom more than she loved me or my Dad. God's work is always good. One shift, one turn...and I'd have been a completely different person with a completely different existence. If that's not testament to God's control, I don't know what is. 

Me and Jesus' first all out

After I graduated high school, I got really sick. The doctors couldn't figure out what exactly was wrong with me...they just knew that I was sick. I remember everyone being in hazmat gear and my Dad and Mom were the only ones willing to come near me without masks and gowns. I had blood poisoning and one of my kidneys was infected...Dad insisted that they throw everything in my intravenous drip to make me better. I know he prayed hard for me...and God listened. It took months of Dad driving me back and forth to town to get IV treatments and I eventually healed.  

My Boys and my Job moment

In 2010, my husband and I were expecting our twin sons. The pregnancy had its challenges unfortunately. I was put on bed rest at about month 3, and when the 5th month was about to start, I went into labor. That lasted 3 days. I delivered both boys against my will. Andrew came out first, still encased in his amniotic sac. Jimmy came out second. He was still alive but declining. They were just shy of 1lb each and they could not save him.  This was my Job moment. I didn't mourn in unbelief, I mourned confused and angry. Just like Job, I would be blessed with my 3rd son just over a year later and my only daughter a year after that.  I get it now...the twins would have been my retirement from baby making. God had plans for not just me-but for my son and daughter, too. Every day I am grateful for both of them. And I appreciate Andy and Jimmy for making room for them. One shift, one turn and my existence would be completely different. I will praise God for my life and all the twists and turns in it. He blessed me yesterday, today and I know He will always. 

My 1st Grandchild

My children are blessings. All of them. But...can I just tell you that being a Grandmother is other worldly...and when I first met this guy...I WAS IN LOVE. I would take out a thousand men with a turkey wishbone for this kid. One turn...one shift...and I would not know the blessing of being his Grandmother. The fact he was born during the whole Covid thing is incredible. Because the world was literally going nuts. But there he was...showing up just as God had planned. 

My Girl

My 2nd grandchild and only granddaughter (to date) arrived. At the beginning, she was sugar and spice...now she's an invincible warrior princess wielding light sabers with glitter polish and all things pink and purple! Again one shift...one turn...and I wouldn't know the absolute magic of a granddaughter. I pray she thinks as highly of me as I do my Grandma. I know my Grandma would have spoiled the bajeebers out of her. We all do. God didn't skimp on "fearfully and wonderfully made" with her. 

My Whirlwind and all out Adventurer

As if 2 grandchildren weren't blessing enough, God sent this little angel to bless me. I could watch him wander all day. He's the one who sees something that most would run in fear from and he just tackles it. He's got this huge heart and is gentle, yet he's fearless and confident. He makes me think of "my cup overflows..." because God has made this season overflow with my grandchildren. 

Melanoma Season

Mid 2024 I was diagnosed with  Melanoma. I've got a hand size scar on my leg that humbles me every day. After a year of treatments, I'm 2 follow ups-NED. God is good. I know every day is a gift because of my scar and continuous follow ups. I see Jesus in my family every day. Especially over the past couple years. My husband slept with me in a downstairs bedroom so I wouldn't have to deal with our stairs. Every treatment...he came with me. I pray that that will be the extent of his caring for me with the cloud of Melanoma always in the distance. Regardless, I know God is with me. Whatever His plan is, I'm all in. No matter what it looks like. 

My Dad

My Dad spent his entire adult life in law enforcement. So Dad was a lot. I mean that in a good way. When I was a kid I didn't worry because Dad would fight my demons, fix my messes and always hug me despite myself. I was a lot. My Dad passed away in the fall of 2025. He declined from dementia (unofficially diagnosed). He was ritual and devoted in visiting me during my post-op recovery and  year of treatments. We talked a lot about our mortality. We watched the Chosen together with my Mom. He always presented as someone who believed in God but he didn't talk much about it. I never really saw my Dad cry growing up. Only when my grandparents passed. My melanoma had him weeping often with me. "You can't go before me." Honestly, we both thought I might. I know he prayed. I know my entire family did. My Dad though...he and Jesus have this relationship...so my Dad got to go before me. My Dad was a proud man. We would talk about having to rely on our family to take care of us...at our worst and most challenging. Dad didn't want that. So I have no doubt that Dad and Jesus talked. I became NED and he declined. Whether God planned it this way or Jesus had extraordinary favor on my Dad, I don't know. What I do know is that my Dad got to leave peacefully and I am NED. I attribute those two facts to God's grace and mercy on both of us.  And our family remembers him as the larger than life-fixer of all things-heart on his sleeve man that he was. I know he will be waiting for me with my boys on each side...and with Jesus.